Toilets

If there’s one thing I hate, it’s the toilets in pubs. They always seem to be so vile and unhygienic, with faecal matter up the walls and urine spread in large puddles across the floor. So one day, I decided to try out the disabled toilets.

I was eating Doritos, perhaps my favourite brand of crisps, while I released my ‘cargo’ into the ‘bay’. Opposite me was a rather odd button, embedded into the wall, with no apparent purpose.

Reset what? The wall? The toilet? The pub? The universe? Explain!!!

Once I’d finished my Doritos, I didn’t know what to do with the packet, so…

There was almost a blockage. Fortunately, there was just enough paper (I almost ran out), so the crisp packet didn’t up a sickening shade of brown…

Outside the pub I saw a blank sign.

And then the behind…

Shows the logic of some idiots…

A Special Date and Time

At 12:34 and 56 seconds on 7 August 2009, the full date and time will be this:

12:34:56 7/8/9

In other words – 123456789

This will never happen again in the future, ever. This is, in every sense of the word, a one off, for eternity.

I’m extremely excited.